The Sacrifice
by Ziny-DiNozzo
Summary: TIVA - Tony and Paula had a one night stand and as a result Paula got pregnant. What happens when Paula sacrifices herself? Will Tony be able to look after their daughter by himself?


**Disclaimer: NCIS isn't mine unfortunately**

**The Sacrifice**

**Prologue**

Paula lay in her hospital bed grinning.

"Well you are good for something; she's gorgeous." She laughed looking down at her new born baby,

"Just like her mum."

Paula laughed, "That morning nine months ago I thought I ruined my life." She said,

"You sure know how to compliment someone."

"But now I realised, you saved me. This is more then I could have ever asked for."

"I never imagined this would happen, but Paula, I'm so glad it did. Thank you." He kissed the top of her head and looked down at his daughter.

"Have you got a name?" Asked a nurse,

Paula was about to say no when;

"Yes. Her name is Cassidy. Cassidy Caitlin DiNozzo." Said Tony proudly.

'_Who knew a one night stand could bring so much?_' He thought as he smiled down at his baby daughter.

**Chapter 1 – Pain**

_Eighteen months later…_

Tony and Paula stood at the crime scene. A bomb had killed her team; they had to find out why.

The thing was; it could have been him. They were supposed to have the weekend shift not Paula.

If he died he would be remembered as a player, a skirt chaser, a joker. His tombstone would read 'Anthony DiNozzo, great friend, experienced agent, loved by all' there would be nothing about Cassidy. He didn't want that.

Paula so secretive about their daughter, she hadn't even gone on maternity leave; she'd filed for long service leave. She begged him not to tell anyone. He wanted to so bad. He wanted to be one of those fathers who took every possibility to show off the picture of his daughter that was proudly displayed in his wallet.

Her parents knew, her best friend knew, her boyfriend knew.

His parents didn't (not that he talks to them anyway), his best friend didn't, his girlfriend didn't.

He knew she wasn't ashamed of herself or him. She loved their daughter so much. She told him she didn't want him to feel bad, she just didn't want everyone at the office to know. Infact she didn't want anyone at the office to know.

He bent down and continued their conversation.

"Maybe I wasn't as caring once as I am now." _I have an 18 month old daughter; of course I'm more caring now._ He thought,

"What brought that on?" Asked Paula, "Or should I say who?"

"Well, you get older, you change."

"Whats her name?" _Please say Cassidy, don't be in love, please, be changed because of our daughter _Thought Paula, _It better not be_… "Please tell me it's not Ziva."

"It's not Ziva." _Why do I lie to myself?_ Thought Tony, _Yes Cass has changed me but truthfully, I'm gonna have to admit it, I love Ziva,_

"Good."

"Her name is Jeanne." _Here we go. Let the lies come, pretend you're in love with Jeanne, that's right, _He mentally scolded himself,

"You lover her?"

"Yea, I do Paula," _I love Ziva,_ he added in his head,

"Wow you really mean that." She whispered, "What's the problem."

Tony sighed, "I can't tell her." _Well that's the truth. I can't tell Ziva unless I want to die a painful death. I can't lie to Jeanne; I don't want to hurt her…_

"Why can't you tell her Tony? It's just three simple little words. I love you." _I do love you Tony, please understand that._

Tony exhaled, "It's not so simple. We were on this climbing wall, and she made a little bet. First one to the top gets to say 'I love you'."

"You lost on purpose."

"No, I won."

"And you didn't say it?" Whispered Paula, grimacing, "Now Tony it's a cliché, but it is true. Life is too short to not tell someone you love them if you do… You do." She fought tears, she knew he would think it's because she lost her team, but really it was because she loved him but now knew he loved someone else.

Paula never knew how true her words were. _Life is too short to not tell someone you love them if you do…_ That day was her last.

"Behind you!" Yelled Tony,

Paula turned and saw the secret door had opened, Jamal Malik stood threateningly in the next room, a bomb strapped to his chest.

She acted instantly. She jumped forward and pushed Jamal to the ground, the door started to close.

"Paula!"

Time seemed to play in slow motion as Paula struggled for the detonator. She looked up and saw her team watching her. She was going to die…

She thought of Cassidy and Tony. She loved them so much.

Tony was pressed against the secret door panicking; he felt the explosion and knew she was dead.

He hit the wall and felt tears form in his eyes. What was he going to do? He didn't know if he could raise Cassidy by himself.

* * *

That night Tony headed to Paula's apartment. He walked slowly up the stairs, got out his key and opened the door, he heard movement.

"Paula!" Came the voice of their nanny, Lily.

He followed her voice and found her reading a book by the TV.

"Oh, hey Tony. Where's Paula?"

Tony opened his mouth then closed it. He opened it once more and managed to say in a low horse whisper, "Paula- Paula… died."

Lily clapped her hands over her mouth. "Oh- oh God. How?"

"She saved all our lives. There was this guy, and he had a bomb. She saved us all at the cost of her life."

"Oh Tony. I'm so sorry." Lily pulled him into a hug, he knew she was crying.

He pulled away, and they walked into Cassidy's room. He looked down at his sleeping daughter and shed a tear. He had to pack.

Lily helped him pack Cassidy's belongings into bags and carry them to his car. Tony walked through the apartment, looking for anything he might need. He walked into Paula's room and sat on her bed. He picked up her Princess Pillow. He'd give that to Cassidy when she was older.

He opened her beside drawer; a photo of him and Cassidy on top of a diary. He picked up the photo and looked at the diary. Part of him was tempted to take it but he didn't. Paula wouldn't want him to look at it. He closed the drawer and stood.

He had to leave.

He walked back to Cassidy's room. Lily walked in.

"Everything's in your car."

"Thank you Lily. I'll give you a lift." He handed Lily the pillow and photo then carefully picked up his sleeping daughter.

He quickly found the buggy with a collapsible handle and placed Cassidy securely inside. He looked at the crib and grabbed the small blanket and placed it around Cassidy.

"Ok. Let's go."

They walked to the elevator and down to his car. Tony set Cassidy in the booster seat and folded the buggy and placed it on the empty chair next to her before getting in the drivers seat.

The drive was silent. All Tony could think about was Paula's words to him.

"_Now Tony it's a cliché, but it is true. Life is too short to not tell someone you love them if you do… You do."_

He decided to follow Paula's advice.

"Lily."

"Yes?"

"Would-" He sighed, "Would you mind taking Cass to my place and looking after her for tonight? There's something I need to do."

"Ok."

"Thanks," He retrieved his wallet and pulled out more then enough money and gave it to Lily. "Here, take it."

Ten minutes later he pulled over and got out. He went to the back and kissed Cassidy on the head, "Mummy loves you, Cass, always remember that."

He walked up into the building as Lily drove away.

Slowly Tony walked up the stairs. He knew he had tears in his eyes but he didn't wipe them away. He found her floor and knocked on her door. She answered, wearing her pyjamas and a dressing gown.

They looked at each other, into the others eyes.

"I love you Ziva." He whispered.

She stepped forward and pressed her lips to his. His hands found the back of her head. He clung to her before pulling back. He caressed her face and looked deep into her eyes.

"I love you too, Tony."

He pressed his lips softly to hers then wrapped his arms around her in a hug, squeezing her tight as he cried.

**What do you think? I plan to write more, atm this is what I write when I have TIVA writters block, or an extremely persistent plot bunny...**


End file.
